everyone brings 2 things, we build one giant cheeseboard across my dining room table, and we play the compliment game, plus my mulled wine recipe and the sign-up website my friends use.
this is what the table looks like by the end of the night!!
cheesegiving instead of friendsgiving
i’m a working mom of two with a full-time 9‑5, and every fall i host cheesegiving for my girlfriends instead of a friendsgiving. it’s my favorite fall tradition EVER. every friend brings 2 things from the list below, we pile it all onto one massive cheeseboard across my entire dining room table, and then we graze and sip wine like it’s our job.
as the host, i keep track of who’s bringing what so we don’t end up with 4 bries and zero crackers 💀 i used to run the sign-ups on a spreadsheet with dropdown menus for every category, and it worked, but my friends still had to open a spreadsheet on their phones and type into it.
so i built my friends a sign-up website. they tap 2 things and they’re done, and it crosses off what’s already coming, even inside the combos, so nobody doubles up.
i don’t keep track of a single sign-up myself anymore, so i get to spend cheesegiving doing what it’s actually for, laughing with my friends and remembering how good it feels to just be together 🤍 below is exactly how i run the whole night, so you can host one for your girls.
everyone brings 2 things
every friend brings 2 items from these 5 categories, or more if she’s feeling generous. tap a category to see what my friends usually bring.
the cheese calculator
tap in how many friends are coming and you’ll get how much cheese, meat, crackers and wine the board needs, plus how to split everyone’s 2 items so the board comes out balanced.
the math uses the rule of thumb for a cheese board that’s dinner: about 3 oz of cheese and 2 oz of sliced meat per person, 1 box of crackers for every 3 people and half a bottle of wine per person.
how we build the board
- put parchment or butcher paper down across the whole dining room table before anyone arrives, so cleanup is easy at the end of the night.
- as each friend walks in, she opens her 2 things and adds them to the table, grouped by category, so the cheeses, meats, crackers and spreads each have their own area.
- pour the wine, and that board is dinner. it fills up fast, and every friend gets to see what she brought on the table !!
pick a cheese, see what goes with it
tap the cheese you’re bringing and you’ll get the pairing, the wine to bring with it and one extra touch. tap “add to my plan” to put it on your printable menu.
easy combos that taste great together
if you’d rather not think about it, bring a whole combo. tap “copy for the group chat” and paste it to your friends so nobody doubles up, or tap “add to my plan” to put it on your printable menu.
my recipes that belong on the board
if a friend wants to show up with something she made, these are the recipes from my site that sit perfectly next to the cheese.
cranberry pistachio brie wreath
4-ingredient dill pickle bites
smashed potato pizza bites
caramel apple chocolate bark
white chocolate holiday barkmy mulled wine
my go-to is a big pot of mulled wine simmering on the stove when everyone arrives. the whole house smells amazing, and it pairs perfectly with cheese.
easy mulled wine
simmer everything on low for 15-20 minutes, don’t let it boil, and serve it warm in mugs.
💡 hot tip: if you need the stove, pour it into a slow cooker on the warm setting after it simmers, so it stays warm all night and friends can ladle their own.
the compliment game
this is everyone’s favorite part of the night, and it’s the reason everyone leaves feeling so good.
- when everyone gets there, each friend writes 3 nice compliments on little slips of paper, each one about a specific person at the table, like “best laugh” or “most likely to remember your birthday.”
- fold all the slips into a bowl, then take turns drawing one and reading it out loud.
- everyone guesses who the compliment was written about, and once you figure it out, that person keeps the slip.
the extras i add
we get a little witchy, so i keep my tarot cards out and pull a card for any friend who wants one. here are the self-read tarot decks i love.
i hand out my moon water energy spray as a take-home gift, and everything you need to make it is here.
i put a small bowl of lactaid or digestive enzymes on the table (lol, realistic).
i tell everyone to toss a tupperware in their bag, bc we always have leftovers.
send the invite in 10 seconds
fill in the date and time, and you’ll get a ready-to-send text that explains the 2-item rule so nobody has to ask you what to bring.
my host checklist
these are the 10 jobs i finish before my friends walk in, sorted by when to do them. add your start time and every job gets a clock time. your checks save on this phone, so you can come back to the list the day of the party.
0 of 10 done
the sign-up website i built
this is the website my friends use to claim their 2 items, and you can set up the same one for your own party.
- 🧀 each friend taps 2 things or claims a whole combo in one tap
- ✅ her picks save on their own and cross off on everyone else’s phone
- 📅 her calendar invite has her list in it and reminds her the afternoon of the party
- 💌 the compliment game rules are on the page before she gets there
want to see the board come together? watch the reel from when we built it 🎥
your printable cheesegiving plan
cheesegiving faq
what is cheesegiving?
cheesegiving is a fall girls’ night where every friend brings 2 items, like a cheese, a sliced meat, crackers, a jam or a bottle of wine, and you build one giant cheese board together instead of cooking a full friendsgiving dinner. the board is dinner, there’s mulled wine on the stove, and you end the night with the compliment game.
what does everyone bring to cheesegiving?
every guest brings 2 items from 5 categories: a cheese, a sliced meat, a vessel (anything you put cheese on, like crackers or crostini), an accoutrement (honey, jam, fruit, nuts or olives) or wine. doubles are fine, and the host usually makes the mulled wine.
how much cheese do you need per person?
when the cheese board is dinner, plan about 3 oz of cheese and 2 oz of sliced meat per person, 1 box of crackers for every 3 people and half a bottle of wine per person. for 8 people that’s about 24 oz of cheese, or 3 to 4 wedges. the calculator on this page does the math for any guest count.
how do you play the compliment game?
each friend writes 3 compliments on little slips of paper, each one about a specific person at the table. fold all the slips into a bowl, take turns drawing one and reading it out loud, and everyone guesses who it’s about. once you figure it out, that person keeps the slip, so everyone goes home with a stack of compliments.
what wine goes with a cheese board?
brie goes with chardonnay or champagne, aged cheddar with cabernet sauvignon, goat cheese with sauvignon blanc, manchego with rioja and bleu cheese with port. a pot of mulled wine on the stove covers everyone who doesn’t want to pick.
how do you keep everyone from bringing the same cheese?
my friends sign up on a website i built that crosses off what’s already coming, even inside the combos. if you don’t have a sign-up page, copy one of the combos on this page into the group chat so each friend claims a whole set.
more hosting systems like this
hosting tips
keep it casual, paper plates are totally fine.
make it cozy with dim lighting, candles and blankets.
put on a mellow playlist, like acoustic covers, norah jones or 2000s throwbacks.
tell your friends to come even if they don’t make it to the store, bc there is always more than enough food.
